While this has nothing to do with negotiation, it was too funny to pass up.  So, reprinted here from the unknown author I give you…….


1. Chicago Cubs outfielder  Andre Dawson on  being a role model: “I wan’
all dem  kids to do what I do, to  look up to me. I wan’ all the  kids to copulate me.”

2.  New Orleans Saint RB  George Rogers when asked about the  upcoming
season: “I  want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards,  whichever comes first”

3. And, upon hearing Joe Jacobi of the ‘Skin’s say: “I’d run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl,” Matt Millen of the Raiders said: “To win, I’d run over Joe’s Mom, too.”

4. Torrin  Polk, University of Houston  receiver, on his coach,  John
Jenkins: “He treats us like men..  He lets us wear  earrings..”

5. Football commentator and  former  player Joe Theismann: “Nobody in
football should  be  called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein.”

6. Senior basketball player at  the  University of Pittsburgh : “I’m going to graduate  on time, no  matter how long it takes.” (Now that is beautiful.)

7.  Bill Peterson, a Florida State  football coach: “You guys line  up
alphabetically by  height.” And, “You guys pair up in groups  of three,
and then line up in a circle.”

8. Boxing   promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson going to prison: “Why would
anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to  prison  for three years, not Princeton .”

9. Stu Grimson,  Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he  keeps
a color  photo of himself above his locker:  “That’s so when I forget how
to spell my name, I can still find my clothes.”

10.  Lou Duva, veteran  boxing trainer, on the Spartan training  regime
of heavyweight Andrew Golota: “He’s a guy who gets up  at  six o’clock in
the morning, regardless of what time it is.”

11. Chuck Nevitt , North Carolina State  basketball  player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why  he appeared nervous  at practice: “My sister’s expecting  a baby, and I don’t know if  I’m going to be an uncle or  an aunt.”

12. Frank Layden , Utah  Jazz president,  on a former player: “I told him, ‘Son, what is  it with  you? Is it ignorance or apathy?’ He said, ‘Coach, I don’t know and I don’t care.'”

13. Shelby  Metcalf,  basketball coach at Texas A &M, recounting  what he told a  player who received four F’s and one D:  “Son, looks to me like you’re spending too much time on  one subject.”

14.  In the words of NC State great  Charles Shackelford ” I can go to my left or right, I am amphibious..”

15. Amarillo  High School and Oiler  coach Bum Phillips when asked by Bob
Costas why he  takes his wife on all the road trips, Phillips responded:
“Because she is too damn ugly to kiss good-bye.”